It drives me nuts that I have to keep saying this over and over and over because people are so insensitive.
DO NOT SEND ME ARTICLES/LINKS ABOUT FAT HATRED.
I’m not sure why people think this is an acceptable thing to do to someone, anyone!
- It’s douchey – why would you link a fat person to fat hatred – I mean do you send other people unsolicited links about abuse and intolerance?
- Do you really think that I don’t know that fat hatred exists in the world and I need it brought to my attention?
- Do you REALLY think that I need to have every single horrible article brought to my attention?
- Have you ever thought that it might be a more considerate thing to do to send me links to fat positive material?
- What do you want me to do with it? Am I supposed to be outraged? Am I supposed to give critique? What do you think my reaction is going to be? Isn’t it a given that I’m going to find it horrible and upsetting, just like you did? So why would you send me that shit?
- Have you ever thought that perhaps, if I actually wanted to read about fat hatred, that I am quite capable of finding it myself?
But most importantly:
Have you given ONE moment of thought how having horribly triggering material, full of loathing for fat people might make ME feel, as a fat person?
Just because someone is a fat activist and is talking on their blog or twitter or Tumblr or whatever about fat hatred, doesn’t mean that they’re there for you to just send triggering, horrible material to them without their consent. Don’t take their right to decide when they want to engage away from them. Don’t expect them to perform, or emote when you click your fingers and shove something shitty in their face.
I give you the option of not following me so that you can opt out of things that I post to a general audience that are upsetting and triggering, give me the same respect by not directly targeting me with content that I never asked to see. I don’t send you articles about fat hate directly to your inbox and say “I found this so upsetting/triggering/enraging/saddening!” Ok, so you were upset about it… now you want me to be upset too?? How is that ever OK?
Don’t be a dick. Think about how that might affect a person. If you want to draw people’s attention to it, post it on your own damn blog. If I want to seek it out, I will. YOU talk about it, don’t use me as your rent-an-activist to give sympathy or outrage at something I never asked for in the first place.
If you ever bothered to take notice, I NEVER post articles or content that is about fat hatred. I post either fat positivity or I speak up against fat hatred – I don’t signal boost the actual horrible stuff itself. I never even link to it on my own blog!
Seriously, it’s like handing someone a steaming turd and saying “Look at this stinky gross thing, how gross is it?! Oh look now you’ve got some on you!” and then wondering why they get angry that you’ve shoved that shit in their face.
Don’t treat me like that. In fact, don’t treat anyone like that. Don’t send people stuff about fat hatred unless they specifically ask for it. Have some consideration.