My name is Kath and I’m a fat activist and feminist. I talk about life as a fat person and work towards obtaining the basic human right for fat people to live their lives in peace, dignity and with respect, without fear of vilification, ridicule or discrimination.
This space is a fat positive space. Fat hate and shaming will not be tolerated. Proselytising of diets or weight loss is not welcome. I no longer allow comments unless specified. For more information on this, see this post.
For further information on the rules of this space, click here.
If you would like to contact me, you can email me here.
Love your blog and wish I had half of your self-love and self-esteem. Just wanted to let you know that as a “skinny” 30 year old, I struggle daily with the feeling of just wanting to crawl out of my skin. Feeling ugly, worthless, ridiculed, and judged is an epidemic unique to women of all sizes! Thank-you for your contribution to the cause of elevating women and encouraging them to step out from the shadows and flaunt their beauty (which comes in all shapes, sizes and colors!!!!) Thanks for the inspiration, Eva
Does your page focus on fat women only? Do fat men not count?
Dan – I am a fat woman and it’s about how I am treated as a fat woman. You’re welcome to create your own blog about the experiences of fat men, in fact I think it’s a good idea.
Blah blah fat hate blah blah.
Dear email@example.com – you’re not even original. How pathetic your life must be.
Thank you for this blog! Tonight I was feeling a lot of fat shame, and turned to google in an attempt to find something that would make this less painful. And your blog has helped already. Although I am a man, and I am fat shamed differently from a woman, I have identified as a feminist and been acting in solidarity with my sisters for many years, and so much of what is said here makes sense to me. I see this as a start to adding fat positivity to my list of social justice topics that I am passionate about, and I feel freer already. thank you so much for being your beautiful self and sharing your ideas with all of us. 🙂
Thank you! You’re a true gem in our community. Thank you for doing a kick ass job at breaking down the walls of silence, discrimination and hatred.
I have just read the article in todays paper. Congratulations.
Just a couple of weeks ago I ended a two month relationship with a bloke who had brought up the issue of my ‘health’ on four different occasions.
The first time it was a passing comment that rang a small alarm bell (which I ignored).
The second was a quiet discussion about how he wanted us both to live for a long time and enjoy a healthy relationship.
The third time was a bit more pointed – he never used the word FAT but there was mention of concern about me potentially getting diabetes.
The final straw came when he brought up the issue of my ‘health’ while I was lying naked in his bed feeling all cosy and on the brink of falling in love. Apparently if I could ‘just do this’ for him we would have a better sex life, and he would love me more.
WTF? Apparently being happy, confident, well dressed, intelligent (MBA qualified) lively and socially active (my diary is brimming with events), concerned about social justice issues and able to do something about it (I started a national charity that raised more than $5 Million over 5 years), and world travelled is not enough. He wanted a different version of me.
Unfortunately for him, that is not what happened. I left.
**applause** You dodged a bullet there Myra. Good on you, you deserve better.
I had a similar experience! And it was such BS because while I took pretty good care of myself, my boyfriend who said that basically lived off pasta and chocolate, smoked pot every day and never exercised! Citing health has become this loophole for fat-shamers. Fortunately I dumped that dude (and he cried) and now I’m with the love of my life.
I am really enjoying your blog. Thanks for your courage & your sweet strength!
Hey! your blog is honestly amazing, thank you for providing a positive space and sharing your strength and opinions. I’d like to reference you in an upcoming English assignment (on sexism – re: Tony Abbott, Julia Gillard and the film ‘The Dictator.’), but I’m not entirely sure how you’d like that to be done?
Gabbi my email is linked on this page, please feel free to drop me a line to discuss.
I love this blog I too am so very proud to love myself my name is LaResa and I am 30 living in Texas married for the past five years to an amazing man I am about 5’6-5’7 I weigh 344 pounds I love me every inch roll crevice and crease !!! I feel beautiful and blessed to be exactly who I am !!! Big thanks to you for starting such a forum I wish all women fat skinny tall short black blue grey and brown allllll loved themselves we are all carefully and wonderfully made !!! Thanks again for starting such a place you have a beautiful soul !!!
So I haven’t looked through you’re whole site but I wanted to tell you that I really like how fierce you are. I’m not really proud of my body all of the time but sometime’s I know I’m rocking it. A lot of the clothes that I buy are however from Torrid, love that place and really think if you haven’t checked it out you should. They have some kind of snazzy clothe’s that are kind of well priced.
Thank you lovingsaraiya. I love Torrid but they don’t ship to Australia! Well, they do, but it’s so expensive!
Kath, I can’t figure out how to subscribe to your blog. I’d really love to. Can you help?
Did you work it out Helena? While logged in to WordPress, click the “Follow” button in the bar across the top of the page. You must be logged into WordPress to do this though.
I’ve just stumbled upon your blog and I looooove it. Also, I love your hair! 😀
Irony: a fat acceptance blog which earns money through “one simple tip to cut down on belly fat” ads…probably not the best thing to bring into a so called safe space!
Ignorance: a blog commenter who doesn’t realise that Google insert advertisements in free blogs based on YOUR keyword searches, that the blog owner has no control over or income from.
Create a WordPress account you rude, ignorant fool and log in and you won’t get Google Adwords inserted into posts, instead of splashing your stupidity all over my blog.
Wow! This is mean! Yes Annabella is ignorant in this case, but rude AND a fool AND stupid? Isn’t that a bit too much name calling for one comment?
However, thank you for teaching me how to avoid those annoying Google Adwords. Also thank you for writing this blog and promoting the cause of fat acceptance. Your work is thought provoking and informative!
Come along to my blog and are rude to me, you’ll get the same in return. I tolerate no shit.
And don’t tone police me on my blog.
The title of your blog is AWESOME! I can’t wait to read it and recommend it to my non-skinny friends.
I think you should send it to all your friends, not just the ones who don’t fit the “skinny” tag. All people benefit from fat activism, not just fat people!
I stumbled across you while reading the (thankfully) out of date Women’s Weekly in a doctor’s waiting room. I already had a completely platonic crush on Chrissie Swan and now you. I love, love, love your attitude! Cathy. 🙂
Thank you Cathy!
I’m so tired of being reminded that we obese folk are now more than half the population. If that’s the case then we are the majority and the rest of you so called normal sods can shut the f### up!
I have something that you might want to check out. The ignorance of these people will make your blood boil.
I was so furious when someone showed me this.
Fat and proud,
Phil. I actually don’t care what some losers on Reddit (the anus of the internet) think about me. I don’t care what they think about ANYTHING. If they want to spend time circle jerking over what awesome dudes they are (ahahahahahahahaaa, fuck I’m funny), then they can. I have far more important things to do.
Please do not waste your time caring what they think, and please do not waste my time and dirty my blog with posting their links on it.
Wow, I am really in awe of how out in the open you are about something I didn’t even realize was a taboo subject until I read this. Huhn. How much do we read about skinny people who aren’t doing anything interesting except starving themselves? How boring is that? You are creating a fiercely supportive, truth-telling, taboo-dispelling masterpiece. Well done! I rarely share about me, but I’d like to for once because I know there are plenty of people like me out there. I only found out I was hypothyroid when I couldn’t get pregnant. I thought I had gained weight because I was eating wrong and working too many hours at a desk (that’s what we are all told, right?). Turns out thyroid trouble is genetic on both sides of my family tree, and no one bothered to tell me. A nurse practitioner told me that I would not get pregnant at all because she could tell by looking at me that I had poly-cystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS). My fertility specialist diagnosed PCOS, and she said my GP would have to prescribe the appropriate thyroid supplement, but that she wanted the TSH level brought down to 2. My GP said, “Oh your number is hardly even out of the normal range, and I wouldn’t treat you at all if you weren’t insisting.” I insisted, and my TSH level went down to 2, and I was pregnant the next month. I also felt a lot better. I did not have (PCOS), thanks for that frightener! I went on to have three perfectly healthy babies, despite being overweight. My doctors assumed I was insulin-resistent and felt I would get gestational diabetes, thanks for another frightener that did not come true. It’s not easy to lose weight when your body is programmed powerfully to hang on to every ounce. What I want to know is why do some many people care about my weight? Why are they so disapproving? I can’t help being hypothyroid. It’s not like taking a supplement makes you not hypothyroid, and it’s not like I’m suddenly 20 again. It’s not like my size makes me stupid or lazy or weak either, but that is the assumptions people make about me. I try to ignore all that, but it’s pervasive in how acquaintances treat me. I think I’m doing great! And you are, too!
bdh63, welcome to the fatosphere! There is a whole world of us out here talking about this very subject and standing up for the rights of fat people. If you have a look down the right side of my blog, you will see a section called “Notes from the Fatosphere”. If you follow those links you will find great blogs from fatties from all over the world, talking about every single subject relating to living in a fat body that you can possibly think of. There really is something for everyone in the fatosphere.
Thank you for sharing your story, it’s one I hear all too often and it seems that there are dozens of fat women being misdiagnosed on sight with PCOS every single day – I was one of them. Part of what is important about fat activism is fighting for the medical profession to stop being so lazy when it comes to diagnosing fat patients and to actually treat us as equals to any other patients. It’s a tough battle to fight, but we will keep fighting it until we have won.
Thanks for the info! I’ll come back and visit soon!
My name is Kevin Gillespie, but I do, MUCH prefer to be called Kev. :).
I live in Wales, & am Following your Blog. 🙂
One of the more memorable experiences I had was 18 months ago. There I was, flat on my back in a hospital gown outside an operating theatre awaiting a D&C while the anaesthatist pulled at his hair, moaning loudly about “what the Hell was he supposed to do with me?” I felt it prudent to point out to him that I had actually walked into the hospital that morning and hadn’t arrived on a flat bed truck.
What a wonderful place you have made here! Thanks for giving articulate and reasoned response to,what needs to be said all the time. There is no reason why all of us cannot reveal the beauty we already have…and it comes from within, frankly. None of us is ugly or beautiful, but thinking makes it so.
Thank you Maxene K-G. To be honest, for me the most important message is that none of us have an obligation to be beautiful.
Depends on your definition of beautiful as society has no idea with the ones they class as such and it changing all the time. Beauty is beauty and is defined by the one whose looks at it. Hence the differing styles of artwork, photography etc. Some people just seem to prefer their heads up their asses so they don’t have to deal with things above their own self-inflated sense of importance. lol
Jean-Yves I appreciate your coming to my and others defense, but please leave me to deal with the shitweasels that come here. They’re really not worth your time, that’s for sure.
Other comments are all several months old, but I just wanted to say thanks for your great blog. I don’t remember how I stumbled on it, but I’m glad I did. Since doing so, I’ve been reading lots of links about thin privilege and privilege in general, and it’s really opened my eyes to things I had never even noticed – like my own attitudes as well as those of “privileged” society in general.
As for being “beautiful”, what does that mean anyway? “Fabulous” and “awesome” are much better choices 🙂
Love this! Body love and acceptance all the way! Can’t wait till the day I learn to accept myself whole heartily. I can see the beauty in all others, just need to see it in myself. You are doing a wonderful thing here 🙂
hey there i live in England and was wondering if anyone knew of the best places to get fairly cheap decent bras in bigger cups? im just about grown out of my 32 f and i struggled to find this size even so the underwire is killer… any suggestions?
Sorry, can’t help you myself, I’m in Australia and have a hard enough time finding bras for myself.
Perhaps someone in the UK might know.
Hey Louise, try Bravissimo! I am in Australia as well, they ship anywhere and stock lovely pretty bras by Freya and others.
Sleepydumpling, your blog rocks! I totally love your no-tolerance responses to the trolls.
I’m a personal trainer in the U.S. I was wondering if you have any suggestions for how to create a safe space for people of all sizes at work. Unfortunately, a lot of people (of all sizes, but especially fat people) don’t feel comfortable at the gym. Everyone has a right to a safe place to exercise and take care of their bodies. You know as well as anyone that being active doesn’t have to be about losing weight – and I never assume that weight loss is someone’s goal unless they explicitly tell me that it is. Is there anything special I can do to foster a fat positive/comfortable space in a fitness-centered workplace?
Jen – thank you for your ask, it seems like you get it! Good to know there are personal trainers out there who do.
I’m not much of a gym person myself, but I remember the days I used to go, and I also know the things that piss me off when I’m out being active in the world. The biggest thing would have to be when people make assumptions about me. Assuming that I’m doing whatever it is to get thin, or that I’m a beginner at whatever it is I’m doing. Really I just want to be left alone to do it!
I think the first thing you can do is ask people what they want from the gym/your personal training. Not many fat people are actually asked that. Secondly, take notice of how other people in the gym are behaving towards fat people, and pull them up on it if they’re being shitty. The most welcoming thing is having a person stand with you, not just having to suffer crap alone.
Have fat friendly equipment. Don’t expect your clients to use equipment that either doesn’t fit their bodies, or isn’t rated for their weights.
And finally, promote fat friendly events. Use the word fat without negativity/stigma – simply as a descriptor. Promote diversity. Promote feeling good. Promote body positivity. If you create that environment, and get a few who are happy, word of mouth will travel.
Thanks so much for your response. The purpose of my job is to improve my clients’ quality and enjoyment of life, and I will continue to act accordingly. For what it’s worth, most trainers that I’ve worked with feel the same way. We prioritize positive self image. Keep up the great work.
I think what you’re doing is incredibly wrong. Shame on you for acting like being unhealthy is something to be celebrated and even promoted. What you’re doing is wrong – you are eating more than your fair share of food and you are harming yourself and telling others that they should do the same.
I don’t give a damn what you think. It’s very self important of you to turn up here with your ill informed, ignorant and most definitely incorrect “opinions” and make a colossal idiot of yourself spewing your bigotry for all to see. How embarrassing of you – it must feel awful to be such an ignoramus in public. Perhaps going out and educating yourself might fix the problem.
Personally, I think you’re breathing more than your share of air, and should probably stop doing it right now. Tell other hateful bigots like yourself to do the same, won’t you?
I’ve just read the article in the Quest about how people take you photo covertly and in your face obvious, and how people say horrible things.
I am just appalled that people can be so cruel.
I LOVE that you are you, I’m glad that you can give it back to them. I completely understand when you say there is no nice clothing for plus size women. Myself and some friends generally have to shop online from the USA. I wanted to share the website with you if you didn’t already know about it, it’s http://www.igigi.com they have beautiful, well fitting clothing for plus size women that actually looks good and fits well.
Keep smiling beautiful.
*blah blah comparison to a whale boring blah blah fat hate nothing original*
It pisses you losers off that I’m the one being sought after to be interviewed for television and newspapers, doesn’t it? Nobody gives a fuck about your opinion, I get so many offers from the media I can pick and choose them.
Jealousy is a curse you sad little fuckstick.
Love that you made a blog on this.
This is a very inspiring and positive site to stumble upon, I love your positive energy. All women are worthy and have beauty in us. Thank you for the positive message. I’ve dealt with a lot of self-hate and negative self-talk and I don’t want to see anyone destroy and tear themselves down the way I have…
I just want to thank you very much for appearing in “Love It” magazine. That’s how I found your blog. I’m over weight due to medical issues & struggling with it. I’m surrounded by a family in which most of them are skinny & most of my friends hardly have to try to lose weight! Just as I see one person who seems OK with their weight, they announce they’re dieting! It’s like everyone’s obsessed, which makes me feel worse, as there’s nothing I can do to lose the weight! It’s so helpful to be able to hear about someone who loves themselves just the way they are. I think the thing that bothers me most about my weight is that I have no control over it. I have a nightmare combination of chronic fatigue syndrome (ME) & polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS). The PCOS makes it difficult to keep weight off & the CFS/ME stops me being able to exercise it off! I used to be so active, it’s been such an adjustment since the virus that caused the chronic fatigue syndrome, I feel like even though it’s been 8 years, my brain hasn’t had time to catch up. It’s so good to hear of someone who is happy with their weight & is not stick thin (which I think is actually unhealthy too).
Thank you Jude. Just one clarification – health never comes into the equation when it comes to the rights of anyone, of any size, to live their lives in dignity and respect. Even the fattest, or thinnest, or sickest, or most incapacitated person has the right to live their lives without vilification and discrimination.
Remember, your value as a human being is in no way connected to your body, weight or appearance.
Amazing blog. I hope more people get inspired seeing your blog.
Ironically, and thankfully, I found this blog while searching up how to starve myself. I am 18 and have been obese my whole life. I am romantically in love with the idea of an eating disorder, (thank you media) and finding this and reading the comments on your posts helps me see that I do not need to be skinny to enjoy myself or to enjoy life. The emotional trauma I’ve endured being fat and being in this society is enough and I shouldn’t go to physical trauma. Thank you.
Hello 🙂 I love your blog and have silently marveled at it many a time. It’s just something small but I have nominated you for the “Very Inspiring Blogger Award” as a tiny nudge of appreciation. Check out http://www.inwardmarvels.com if you wish to participate (it can be fun!). Otherwise, have a wonderful time and Merry Christmas! Best, MarvellineMarvels
I love your blog – you are an inspiration to all women. I know you get lots of hate-mail for daring to live as you want and owning your body but what you are doing with fat activism is helping to make a more tolerant world for the future. I know it probably doesn’t feel like that, and it’s easy for me to say that not having a public blog and exposing myself how you do, but you are very brave to do so, and to put up with all the abuse. A world in which women aren’t expected to be pretty, skinny and generally within a very narrow definition of what beauty is. I’m so tired of women being abused for not being a certain weight/build or not even being as pretty as other women. The reality is that everything is on a spectrum – we can’t all be skinny/underweight as it wouldn’t even be our normal weight or healthy for us to do so (despite what the “health” brigade wants us to think). Same with beauty – not all women are equally conventionally attractive and that’s fine. Same with how not all people are equally smart or talented at art or music or writing. And that’s okay – because we’re all different. Why can’t we accept differences?! Why do men have to be vocal about how women look. If they find you unattractive they call you names and take photos of you without your consent. If they do find you attractive, the misogyny takes the form of quite disgusting sexual comments – I’ve known conventionally attractive girls who have guys offer them “sex tutoring” and being asked to take their tops off or do other random sex acts by men randomly in public. Vile! And when I read posts regarding people taking photos of you and saying nasty things at you – utterly despicable and disgusting behaviour. How dare they?! Your writing has inspired me and I just want to thank you for your activism.
You are fucking A W E S O M E ! ! !
No!! You’re kidding me right? I never noticed before. I just had a blog called “Fat Heffalump” and called myself a fat activist because I thought it would be fun.
How old are you, six? If you’re any older, you should probably go get some remedial reading and writing lessons, your spelling and grammar are an embarrassment.
there is no question about it. dont try to justify it. It is because ur 2 lazy to get ur ass up and work out & can’t resist the D (donuts)
At least I don’t hide behind aliases online to be a nasty little turd, and I can read and write enough to parse basic grammar in a blog comment.
You’re so EDGY. As edgy as a delicious, round donut.
I have been looking up things on the fat acceptance movment for a while now. Some of it I can get behind. Like the whole love your self no matter what size you are type thing. But can you explain to me how anyone can be healthy at any size. Especially say someone who is 600 pounds. Also can you tell me certain points of the fat acceptance or body positive movement that you believe in and how it can be good for our society.
Ps. No I have not read all of your blog to know exactly what you believe.
My hourly rate for education sessions is $35AUS per hour.
Otherwise you have this ENTIRE BLOG, the VAST resource list I have already provided and Google for you to pull your finger out and educate yourself. I’m not here to answer your essay questions at your demand.
And thank you for that responce. That was soo helpful! Didn’t realize you need to pay to get someone’s oppionion. What was wrong with answering the first thing I asked ? You are the prime example of what’s wrong with society. You take one question as offensive ( when clearly it wasn’t ) and go ape shit.
“Go ape shit”? You’re the one throwing a tantrum because I won’t spend my time educating you for free (here’s a freebie, it’s spelled “opinion”). Yes, you do need to pay to get my time and work. You want my opinion? There is EIGHT YEARS of my blog here, giving my opinion, for free. Read it. I am not a performing monkey that you can demand “dance monkey, do my bidding” whenever you’re too lazy to do some research yourself.
And people will say that fat people are lazy – I’m looking at some of the laziest bullshit I’ve ever seen right here.